Catching up to Her

Not everyone is always, just as you cannot expect me to be.

But, what we can do is keep trying, every minute of every day to remain in alignment with our own individual always, the truth of who we are, so that trust can build again.

Catching Up to Her Liv Dayal Kaur Clouds

I have never been good at “friends”. My best years were from K-4, and then she moved to Puerto Rico, without warning, and I was ruined. She didn’t even give me a hint. She just gone. I didn’t know where she went and nothing made sense.

She was with me every day, laughed at all the same things, and listened to my sad whispers. My mother did what she could, but she was a single mother of three, one with a disability. My friend made me laugh, protected me (because I was, and am still, fun sized), and made me feel like I was cool enough to be in Dance Club with all of the other popular girls, even if the Dance teacher made it clear that you should quit.

It was only years later that I found out her mother took her to Puerto Rico to get away from her Dad.

I didn’t know.

All that time I was angry. And in a moment, because I knew the truth of it all, my anger vanished. Thoughts flickered from infinite forgiveness to compassion, concern and ache. Ache because I knew, in my heart that I betrayed “friendship”. I should have trusted. I should have stayed open.

The older I got, the more contracted I became in my heart. I trusted no one. I would pretend to, really, really well. But I never really let anyone in. As I got older, my heart hardened. Why be vulnerable? Why be open? Abandonment.

I am learning not to live in such a defensive way. In fact, the bricks are crumbling. I am finally learning that what my friend taught me, was that the deep connection I was looking for was within me. Always. I vibrate with it, I can hear it sing back to me when I am quiet enough to hear.

Now, I make time for her, my Soul. I sit, and sing to her. I close my eyes and see her. I give her the time and space to grow from a hologram to reality. Sometimes, I can hold her in reality for a moment. Sometimes, I smile and wave at her, all in white, with a golden light around her. With a purely compassionate love, I send her on ahead of me so my understanding of her, can catch up to her, in this life.

She always has and always will be with me.

Sat Nam.

Catching Up to Her Liv Dayal Aperture Vintage

Photo by Aperture Vintage on Unsplash

P.S. I am part of an training women’s group, Aquarian Women’s Leadership Society. A small part of this membership includes a monthly (lunar based) Kriya. I emphasize small because the benefits of this group are incredibly deep when combined with the rest of their offerings. The online Facebook group alone is worth considering. Regardless of what’s talked about, it’s a place where women are unashamedly vulnerable, fearless, and supportive at the same time. If you’ve lived a life without that as a woman, and I’ll never drink coffee again so long as I live. That’s what I thought. That alone, is priceless. I believe, that consistent pouring of vulnerability amongst women in my field of vision on a daily basis has helped me chip away at my defenses.

When what you learn growing up is to never let anyone see you suffer, when suffering in silence, but, be sure to smile, is the call of the day, the online group is worth it’s weight in gold.

Last month, they offered a Kriya that I did most days. You can do this 2-3 times a week, or every day as a challenge. I found the actual kriya set, Meditation on the Self online from 3HO (although in the training group, it’s called The Warrior’s Heart, and I know this is what’s been softening me.

The mind is given to you to use in self-expansion. But you do not channel it or capture it; it runs wild on old thought patterns and habits. If you cannot have the mind when you need it, it is useless. The function of mind is not just to spew out random thoughts! It is to fashion etheric elements into forms of energy that manifest through the earthly elements.

If you do work this Kriya know this about the length of time. I would love to hear what comes up for you. I chose 40 days:

40 Days: Practice every day for 40 days straight. This will break any negative habits that block you from the expansion possible through the kriya or mantra.

90 Days: Practice every day for 90 days straight. This will establish a new habit in your conscious and subconscious minds based on the effect of the kriya or mantra. It will change you in a very deep way.

120 Days: Practice every day for 120 days straight. This will confirm the new habit of consciousness created by the kriya or mantra. The positive benefits of the kriya get integrated permanently into your psyche.

1000 Days: Practice every day for 1000 days straight. This will allow you to master the new habit of consciousness that the kriya or mantra has promised. No matter what the challenge, you can call on this new habit to serve you.

Magical Summer School

I didn’t realize that I was creating a really magical summer school sitch for myself, as I was gobbling up all the goodness being offered this summer. Turns out, I wasn’t looking at the timing, just making sure that I signed up for what interested me. They’re all kicking off, or have already kicked off this summer!

From Divination to Muggle Studies, I’ve been busy. I thought I would share what I am studying / fascinated / obsessed with should you feel called to do the same.

Summer School Currently Cristina Tarot

Divination

Lindsay Mack has offered some intensive workshops for tarot the last couple of months. Trauma and the Tarot, The Court Cards, The Swords, and Court Card Immersion. You cannot sign up for these, as they won’t be back until next year. I wouldn’t leave you high and dry though. She is close to opening enrollment for her full 8 week course, Tarot for the Wild Soul. Tarot for the Wild Soul runs from September 6th – October 25th, 2018 and enrollment for the course opens to the public on July 24th. I was going to take it, but made a last minute swap after speaking with my guidance counselor (aka intuition). You’ll see what I mean. If you are interested, I would highly recommend taking her course!

Follow @wildsoulhealing on Instagram

Summer School Currently Cristina Herbalism

Herbology

The Herbal Academy has incredible offerings for all things plant related! I cannot believe I just found this one night. Isn’t it how it always works? I made sure to <a href=”http://Preview Lesson from the Introductory Herbal Course“>preview the Introductory Herbal Course before I added it to my summer schedule.

The interface is super intuitive, they provide downloads with a syllabus, recommended book list broken out by how far along on your plant medicine journey you are on, and a private Facebook group. The content is easily digestible and here’s the best part, in my opinion anyway: you can’t move on to the next unit in the course, unless you have an 80% or above on each quiz. Now, can I get an amen! Only the serious need apply here.

FREE โ€“ Becoming an Herbalist Course is live, enroll by August 5!

If you aren’t ready to invest in this course (i.e. you are overloaded with summer plans – in a good way – and maybe would rather wait till the fall to start, check out this FREE mini-course offering: <a href=”http://Free Becoming an Herbalist Mini Course“>Becoming an Herbalist. Enrollment opens July 19th!!

Follow Herbal Academy on Instagram.

Summer School Currently Cristina Astrology

Astrology

The Daily Hunch Academy. I found Steph like you find anyone else who’s super into the stars (is that even true?), on Instagram. I loved her feed because all of her forecasts were so spot on for me. When she said she was offering The Daily Hunch Academy, I was bummed because I missed enrollment. I kept up with her, and when she opened enrollment again, I jumped on it.

The content is super broken down and easy to navigate, but I think the assignments are the most fun. I don’t want to spill the tea here, because I hate spoilers. Needless to say, her assignments have brought the heavenly bodies down to earth and made me laugh at myself while doing it. She also shares a preview on her site and I snagged that to keep me satiated as I waited for enrollment to open! It looks like you can still register for this 4 month, well-paced-because-astrology-is-really-hard course so if you’re interested, I’ll see you in the private Facebook group for this!

Follow The Daily Hunch on Instagram.

Summer School Currently Cristina.png

Muggle Studies

Um, so, your girl is so deep into this Kundalini shhh that it’s crazy. I took a workshop, and loved it. Then whatever-whatever happened (read up!) and I didn’t go back. Zoom to three months later, I went back to a workshop on intuition and ๐Ÿ‘let๐Ÿ‘me๐Ÿ‘tell๐Ÿ‘you๐Ÿ‘ I am on a high like no other. So much so, that I took the money that I budgeted for the Tarot for The Wild Soul course, that I have been saving up for for months, MONTHS! and applied it to the Aquarian Women Leadership Society Experience, August 3-5.

Brooklyn is going camping!!! No-air-conditioning-using-the-bath-house-near-the-cafeteria camping.

Summer School Currently Cristina Kundalini
From Guru Jugat Instagram feed!

My Kundalini teacher, Devi Ananda, are going to road trip it for almost four hours and spend 3 days in upstate New York learning with Guru Jugat, and meeting others from all over the world! Yoga, meditation, talks, breakout sessions, s’mores? YES!!!

I’ve signed up for RA MA TV, and get to the studio early, just to practice.

Summer School Currently Cristina Kundalini Guru Jagat

You know that I am already working on my budget to sign up for the Aquarian Women Leadership Society subscription when I get back from camping with my friends.

We also purchased Guru Jugat’s book, Invincible Living and have been carrying around with us everywhere. I did the green diet on the last new moon and lost enough weight to kickstart my body into gear. I’ve only gained two pounds back so I am still under the 140 mark (which is a big difference in how it makes my back feel) and haven’t been here since last year. What? What’s the green diet? Why on the New Moon? GET THE BOOK. Required reading for my summer school!

If you want to audit my magical summer school sesh, follow them all on Instagram, turn on notifications and see what happens. See if anything resonates. Then, tell me all about what you think!

What are you interested in lately?

* Disclosure: Some of the links above are affiliate links, meaning, at no additional cost to you, I will earn a commission if you click through and make a purchase. I only recommend what I use and love.